Relationships as a Business

And this [CLICK HERE!] is what I state I haven’t seen in the world.

Frankly, I haven’t even seen people aiming for that.

What I see is people facing relationships in terms of benefits. So, the relationships are just means to get something. It’s a ‘business’.

In business, the rule is that you get something valuable in exchange for something less valuable and that’s how you make a profit. That’s how you make your happiness. Everything adds up to the price and you add your costs and margins all there. Then add some up percent so in the case the customer wants to negotiate, you can offer a discount while still making a margin. And since businesses are set in a marketplace, it’s a constant push pull with the prices going up and down, and demand and competition and some business go bankrupt, just a few make it big and most just barely cover the costs.

The sex marketplace has the business model. Natural selection, hormones, competition, value, settling, switching. A great design by nature or whatever deity you decide to believe in. Awesome for evolution. How about relationships?

What I see out there is people treating their relationships with the business mentality.

People want the benefits associated with relationships, sex, company, love, family, stuff, getting their needs met. Avoiding loneliness and filling a void. In exchange of/for something. It’s less about the relationship itself than it’s about all these aggregates. And each and every aggregate has a price point, a number.

Think of the shadows of gray here:

— I want to go to the game with you; I know you love that and I want to share it. Who’s your favorite team?

— OK… I’m going to the game, but you have to come see my concert, and learn the lyrics.

So, that second line is great ‘game’, right? Most of the ‘game’ stuff is about learning the ‘business’ aspect of relationships. You can profit. But how about the relationship itself? Beyond the mutual exchange of benefits? Beyond the traffic of values?

What I see out there is that it’s never about the relationship itself, so it eventually deteriorates and becomes sick, but the parties don’t want to quit it because of the pain of losing all these benefits.

“Nobody to join me at the game/concert, and our shared assets, and I need the sex, I don’t want to be alone, I don’t want the change”. Or sometimes, one of them just quits and steals all of the benefits, inducing bankruptcy in the other party.

You know that story.

So, how many relationships out there are without the business model?

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2 comments
  1. love that you found my original blog post, lol .. thank you 🙂
    (Now you see I’m a complete screw up,right?) hahah …

    However,, as someone who does business with her eyes shut you always give me food for thought .. and I love reading your writings!

  2. Hey, thanks for popping by my blog!

    I read both your posts and I have a few thoughts.

    First off, I get what you’re talking about — what you see around you is unfortunately typical. I think it’s referred to as “social bargaining”, and it’s the reason that people tend to marry within their race, their culture, their socio-economic class, their intelligence range, their values, etc. While it seems that the ways in which we commodify each other is getting progressively worse (I have thoughts on the reasons behind that, too — but that would be a tangent), I think that social bargaining can have functions for keeping the power in a relationship balanced.

    Second, I think that people have many reasons for sticking out or hanging around in a relationship — just because you’re dating someone because they can give you “X” benefit (convenience/sex/money/companionship/access to a beach house) now, doesn’t mean you didn’t like them for who they were at one point or won’t like them for who they are sometime in the future. All relationships can hit a bump or two in the road.

    In the end, it’s really up to each couple to sort out what they want in life and from each other, right?

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