I’ve dabbled in about 20-30 blogs since my very first venture into blogging, so I’m not new to the blogging game. I’ve written some well received blog posts on a variety of topics as well as some duds on a variety of topics.
I’ve had my share of positive and negative experiences (more-so the former rather than the latter, fortunately), and I’ve made it a point to have fun, make connections and — more importantly — friends along the way. It’s been nice meeting a whole hell of a lot of different people from different parts of the world. I feel that I’ve gained at least somewhat a nice amount of knowledge along the way.
I still don’t know shit about life, though, and that’s a part of one of my many New Years resolutions, to learn, grow and morph into a wiser man by the end of the year, and embark on an even longer journey by the time 2013 gets here. Learning should never stop, you know? As soon as you stop growing in some capacity in your life, you start dying. Some might say you plateau, but if you halt yourself from striving forward, what the hell is there left to do?
I’ve always been self-motivated, and honestly, I think everybody is inherently self-motivated. Some people justify their motivations by giving valid reasons to warrant their hard work towards accomplishing their goals. That’s completely fine, but at the end of the day you are the person who’s responsible for accomplishing your own goals in life. You are in the driver’s seat of your vehicle. Does that make any damn sense?
When I was younger, I wanted to become a writer so that I could captivate people and shape and shift their thoughts in ways that others whom aren’t writers can’t. I didn’t give up on this dream, I simply put it on the back burner and started accruing more goals. As I saw (and allowed) my life take a downward spiral in 2010 and 2011, I developed more aspirations and left them scattered in my mind.
Do you ever sit back and look at the people around you, the people that you love, and watch them change, and not change for the better but more-so for the worst? I’ve watched this happen over 2010 and 2011, and I’ve emotionally over-invested in these pattern of thoughts. How could somebody be so amazing of a person, and then change? It sucks. Putting somebody on a pedestal is dangerous, so please, never do it. Change is necessary in life, though. Change will happen whether you like it or not, whether you are ready or not. Embracing it is the only option to truly become happy.
Is it natural to abhor change? I think so. In all honesty, I would be complacent if my life were the same as it was in 2008-2009 and never changed. The reason is simple: I was happy, didn’t feel any stress or pressure, felt successful, was in amazing mental and physical shape, and everything felt right. 2008 and 2009, those two years… that’s my safe zone.
I look at a 2010 and 2011 in the most pessimistic retrospective, but can you blame me? I associate 2010 and 2011 with so much negativity given all of the heart wrenching memories that I don’t care to think too much about (although I do at the most inopportune times). I’m complacent and comfortable with the years 2008 and 2009, yet I’m absolutely against 2010 and 2011.
Complacency is usually a bad thing in the grand scheme of things in life. If you are complacent in life, then where are your goals, dreams, desires, motivation to lift yourself into a greater place? There’s an adage that goes, “Satisfaction is the death of desire”. I think complacency can be fatal to your pursuits of accomplishing your goals. Yep, 2008 and 2009, they were incredible years for me and I grew as a person tremendously, but if things were completely the same in 2010 and 2011, what could I be working on as the future leaks over into the year 2012?
I don’t even know what the hell I’m really getting at in this blog. I’m just trying to make a point that not everything is so black and white as it may appear. In retrospect, our individual, respective histories, everything that’s great that we remember may be exaggerated — naturally — in our minds, because nostalgia can create a sense of bittersweet comfort. If we have a fond past, we look back fondly and exaggerate our memories. I know I do, but I still think 2008-2009 were incredible years, and I’m not changing my mind about that… however, those two years will remain in the past, and all that I — or you, and everybody else — have now is the future, and that’s something important to always keep in mind.
Time is precious. The people around you won’t be around FOREVER. Make the best of your resources in life and make the choice to be happy or sad. Either way, you have a choice. You can be blisteringly happy or abysmally sad. Either way, you are going to make an impact because a person’s attitude affects everybody in their environment. Keep that in mind.
I’m not sure why, but for some reason it’s apparently taboo for a man to write about his emotions and try his best to articulate them in a way to make a point. I created this blog so that I can write about anything at anytime. I’d like to personally welcome everybody to read and to comment, and I thank those who have started following.
My life is at the crossroads right now, and I don’t know what the hell is going to happen in my life in 2012. The feeling of the unknown is admittedly scary, but it’s also exciting. Let’s take the leap.